A little luck

Sorry for this but the old kid could use a little luck. Actually some good stuff in here…

Message
This is without a doubt one of the nicest good luck forwards I have
received. Hope it works for you -- and me!

You have 6 minutes

There's some mighty fine advice in these words, even if you're not
superstitious. This has been sent To you for good luck from the
Anthony Robbins organization. It has been sent around the world ten
times so Far.

Do not keep this message.

It must leave your hands in 6 MINUTES. Otherwise you will get a
very unpleasant surprise. This is true, even if you are not
superstitious, agnostic, or otherwise faith impaired.

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their
conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all
you want.

FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it.

FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams
don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the
only way to live life completely.

TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to
answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve
great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for
others; and responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate
steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in
your voice.

TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.

Now, here's the FUN part!

Send this to at least 5 people and your life will improve.

1-4 people: Your life will improve slightly.

5-9 people: Your life will improve to your liking.

9-14 people: You will have at least 5 surprises in the next 3
weeks.

15 and above: Your life will improve drastically and everything you
ever dreamed of will begin to take shape.

It's Bristol Baby Whoooooo!

This weekend NA$CAR hits Bristol Motor Speedway in TN. Heaven on Earth for a hillbilly racefan. I've visited seven tracks now and look forward to growing the list in the future. Bristol is 1/2 mile track that seats 160,000 fans. That's even more than at Daytona where the season begins on a 2 1/2 mile track. It's the hardest ticket to get your hands on. It's number one on my list as well. I'd stretch that trip out to visit Nashville and Memphis too. Git-r-done !

EVER FORWARD

Mood of the moment ~ It's raceday

Tune of the moment ~ Star Spangled Banner (race is about to start)

What's for supper ~ Grilled salmon stuffed with oranges and green onions, veggies

A few words from Jack MacDonald

This week we welcome back guest columnist Jack MacDonald with his sexual views from the pews of rural Nova Scotia....

SOCIAL SECURITY SEX
Two men were talking. "So, how's your sex life?" "Oh, nothing special. I'm having Social Security sex." "Social Security sex?" "Yeah, you know; I get a little each month, but not enough to live on!"

LOUD SEX
A wife went in to see a therapist and said, "I've got a big problem, doctor. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this ear splitting yell."
"My dear," the shrink said, "that's completely natural. I don't see what the problem is." "The problem is," she complained, "it wakes me up!"

QUIET SEX
Tired of a listless sex life, the man came right out and asked his wife during a recent lovemaking session, "How come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?" She glanced at him casually and replied, "You're never home!"

CONFOUNDED SEX
A man was in a terrible accident, and his "manhood" was mangled and torn from his body. His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance wouldn't cover the surgery since it was considered cosmetic. The doctor said the cost would be $3,500 for "small, $6,500 for "medium, $14,000 for "large."
The man was sure he would want a medium or large, but the doctor urged him to talk it over with his wife before he made any decision. The man called his wife on the phone and explained their options. The doctor came back into the room, and found the man looking dejected.
Well, what have the two of you decided?" asked the doctor.
The man answered, "She'd rather remodel the kitchen."

WEDDING ANNIVERSARY SEX
A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 50th wedding anniversary. The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: 'Here Lies My Wife-Cold As Ever'."
"Yeah," she replies, "when you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'"
WOMEN'S HUMOROUS SEX My husband came home with a tube of K-Y jelly and said, "This will make you happy tonight." He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs. He couldn't get back in.

ELDERLY SEX
One night an 87 year old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92 year old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor "assisted living apartment" .. Killing him instantly.
Brought before the court on charge of murder, the judge asked her if she had anything to say in her defense. She began coolly, "Yes, your honour, I figured that at 92, if he could have sex . He could fly."

On your worst day

Watch this.
http://www.break.com/index/a_fathers_love.html
Sorry for the heavy. But it works....You can.

Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Tis the day to be Irish or a wannabe. We've got a family dinner and I'm cooking. While Irish grub isn't exciting it'll fill you up. Cooking with beer can't hurt either! Guiness Meat Pie, Guiness Stew and Irish potted chicken should cover it. I'm Scottish and Jen's Irish, both pig headed and stubborn nothing like a drinkin' holiday to stir the pot!

Ever Forward
Mood of the moment ~ Happy go lucky in a cooking with beer kind of way!
Tune of the moment ~ Fishermans Blues ~ The Waterboys
What's for supper ~ See above

Chaos and Mayhem at Wally-World

Big day in the Sackville Metropolis today, actually it was in Bedford but it would've been bigger news in Sackville. The new Walmart opened! The flyer came out on the weekend. Deals, deals, deals abound. Where better for an unemployed guy to go on a Wednesday morning? We didn't really need anything....

But KD supplies dipped into the single digits and cases were on for $6, Pepsi 2L's 97 cents and honeynut cheerios another staple here were on for $2. I got to the store around 8:45 or so and the lot was packed. I wandered the store for a minute intrigued to see people literally guarding carts with coolers in them.

I head to the back near the sporting goods (I needed to get paint tinted anyway) and it was a war zone. No shit, I'm serious! Skids of coolers were being brought out one at a time to the masses and devoured. What's a guy to do but jump in. I'm a fairly big guy but in the span of ten minutes I had my feet stepped on, took an elbow from an old girl who smelt bad and I swear I saw a knife! Well maybe not the latter but definitely the prior. Mob mentality at it's finest. I haven't seen anything like this since the looting incident at the NASCAR races in New Hampshire (different story for a different time). It is true that you have work to make your dollar go further but I long to get back to the work part primarily!

EVER FORWARD

It's true I cling to my past but here's a reason why

Every now and again you get an email from a friend that makes your day. Sometimes it’s a chain letter wishing you luck or whatever…

Today I got a smile and a flashback. My buddy Len sent me a Youtube link that takes you back to my apartment on Arthur Street circa December 25, 1994 (actually by then it was likely Boxing Day). Many of you have heard of this place but never got the chance to visit. It was home to many epic shakers. For several years I threw a HOHOHO Down on Christmas night for my young foolish friends. Hard to top the police coming with a noise complaint on the holiest of holy days.

A legendary skit wound up on tape that night. The star performer is Tony Hendsbee (AKA H). The Gaetan Boucher chronicles a young man’s quest for Miss Right Now. Perhaps you’ve had the speed skates on before as well. Travel with me to 1994, when living was good and rent was $250.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7jKrdvcJrg

Anything Goes on Christmas Night

Ever Forward
Mood of the moment ~ That bright Orb is out in the sky so I'm happy
Tune of the moment ~ Animal ~ Def Leppard
What's for supper ~ Chicken wings, spinach salad and veggies

Free Advice

Don't Fart in Bed

If this story doesn't make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know
and I'll pray for you.

This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years.

The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting
loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.

Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because
it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was
perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one
day he would blow his guts out.

The years went by and he continued to rip them out!

Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for
dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put
the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a
malicious thought came to her.

She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep
and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband
of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.

Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting
which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps
as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she
rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she
reckoned she had got him back pretty good.

About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his
bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she
asked him what was the matter.

He said, "Honey, you were right." "All these years you have warned me
and I didn't listen to you."

"What do you mean?" asked his wife.

"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts
out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some Vaseline and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in."

Credit to Mother for sending this along

A trip to the wood does most bodies good

I got to the woods this weekend. Some four wheeling, some eating, some drinking and some playing. Good times indeed. Lake Charlotte is somewhere I had never been before, huge lake, lots of camps and we dropped by a number of them. Lots of laughs, just what the doctor ordered! Now it's nappy time.

EVER FORWARD

Mood of the moment ~ A little peaked...
Tune of the moment ~ Race is on
What was for supper ~ McD's (like I needed more junk this weekend)

Game over for Halifax

Somewhere in Glasgow a fiddler cranked out a reel and in Nigeria there was sure to be a celebration. Halifax lived up to it's reputation. That of a Culture of Defeat. Did your breakfast taste different this morning? It should have, there will be a rotten taste left by this for some time to come. Wait for all of the dirty laundry to be aired. $1.7B was clearly too much money for our region. Why could this bid not have been given another 10 days? What would the difference be? Do people care that this event would have brought a legacy of change to this region? "No vision, no passion, no leadership," said Deputy Mayor Sue Uteck unofficially kicking off her campaign for Mayor.

Mastercard has a series of commercials for a situation like this.

Estimated Cost of hosing 2014 Commonwealth Games
$1,700,000,000

Estimated Cost of bid process to date
$6,000,000

Cost of falling down face first on the WORLD stage proving we ARE a defeatist region?

PRICELESS

Grumble grumble, gonna be nice day tomorrow, I'm going 4 wheeling. Giddyup!

EVER FORWARD

Mood of the moment ~ Beat down Maritimer
Tune of the moment ~ Tripper~ Jimmy Rankin
What's for supper ~ Starting on ribs, beans, slaw and corn bread....

Little Flakes Big Piles

Big storm advisory for tonight and tomorrow. Oooooh aaaah! It's been a pretty light winter to date, no I'm not tempting the snow gods here (I repeat NOT tempting them). As the maintenance guy here at Chateau Mac I don't mind not shovelling every other day. I do very much miss Chuck on storm days with his 4 wheeler and plow. Photos above are from White Juan a few years back and I'm fine with them just being "file photos". I've got tickets for the Mooseheads game tonight but doubt I'll make it....

EVER FORWARD!

Mood of the moment ~ Doing the no snow shuffle

Tune of the moment ~ Four Strong Winds ~ Neil Young

What's for supper ~ Friday Night Pizza